皇社81岁股东:扬赫尔还没我健壮;4000多万就买仨看医务室的(皇社81岁股东炮轰:我比扬赫尔还结实,砸四千余万只买来三名医务室常客)

想怎么处理这段话?要不要我翻译、润色成更像新闻标题,还是做成社媒文案/配图文案?
先给你一个英译 + 几个中文改写备选:
英文翻译
- “An 81-year-old Real Sociedad shareholder: ‘Yangel isn’t even as robust as I am; we spent over 40 million just to sign three guys for the medical room.’” 
中文改写(更通顺/标题化)
- “皇社81岁股东吐槽:扬赫尔都不如我健壮,四千多万买来仨‘医务室球员’”
- “81岁股东怒怼皇社引援:扬赫尔不如我硬,四千万砸来三位伤号”
- “花四千多万换来三位‘医务室常客’?皇社81岁股东:扬赫尔还没我壮”
需要我:
- 挑一版做成海报/推文文案? 
- 再润色几版不同语气(犀利/克制/中性报道)?
- 查下具体出处做个背景小综述?
